My father died on Monday, April 11th at 12:50pm. He was 93 and lived a good life. I saw him the morning of his passing and held his hand and he only briefly opened his eyes, for just a moment. He was breathing heavy, but it appeared less labored, even from what I had seen the night before. I knew the time was near.
We started seeing the signs last month. He became a little bit more fragile looking, walked a little slower and tired easily. Over the past 2 weeks, he began telling us that he was “dying”. I would say to anyone, when your parents are strong enough to tell you that they are dying, we should all listen. It’s so easy to just ignore it and play it down. Maybe it’s because most of us don’t want to hear it, don’t want to realize that life does come to an end. My father was always like that, so I should have known better. He was always ‘to the point’ on just about everything in life.
My sister, brother, mother and wife were all at his bedside when he passed. I had just returned to the house from the office and was able to still hold his warm hand, even in the minutes after his death. To me, he looked peaceful. Soon after, the funeral home came to take opa from us and transfer him to the crematorium. He had always wanted to be cremated, just like his mother before him. He had sprinkled her ashes over the bay from the pier of her final apartment on Ocean Drive. My mother and father had both purchased a plot in the 1970′s under a beautiful tree at Memorial Gardens. This is a place I often cycle by knowing my father would once be laid to rest here. I will continue to visit often.
The funeral on Friday, April 15th was wonderful. It was a beautiful and uncharacteristically cool day for April. We listened to the wonderful eulogy by my sister and we all gave a few passing words before his ashes were laid to rest.
The celebratory party at the house afterwards was something opa would have loved. Friends and family gathered at the house, exchanging stories and past events. We had books made with photos of opas life and happy moments.
Since the weekend has passed and it’s now 1 week since his passing, we will take a moment of silence at 12:50 today in memory of Opa. The happy memories will sustain us. I will remember my father fondly, sharing a coffee and cigar at the house. I visited him every morning at the house and watched him enjoy his sudoku puzzles to keep his ‘mind sharp’. The picture above is how I will remember my father. Always talkative, happy to sit in the yard and share stories. He was a wonderful man and will be missed.
